Yeah, it is April dude!

So, today I got 3 Victims. First best friend Ruri Kartika, my junior in school Gea yous, my cousin Bianda Nathania. Perhaps the story of Kartika and Gea Ruri yous do not need me to tell here, because it can be said is confidential heehehe. So just tell you about my cousin, at first I just wanted to make Bianda cry I do not have the heart to make him cry, Bianda had a hamster named Zeus gray, purchased on the 5th of February 2012, simultaneously with I bought hamsterku, Google and Wigle, Zeus fat-bodied,grey, round, he's lazy and he's male, bianda love Zeus, so I told her hamster died , he was shocked and her face is unbelievably sad I almost laughed out loud, and he said because of what slowly and moaning, and I can not bear to see her, and immediately I said, it's because Aprilmop, Bianda laughing, and suddenly bianda arrive directly asked me for shopping at Indomaret. So I thought okay, so we're shopping for a snack, then we go home. Here, I apologize to you guys, because I've tricked you all. Ruri, Gea, Bianda, hehe I find it hard to forget the look on your face, seriously, because your faces its rarely to show, so I apologize if you feel anxious before or something else, apologize profusely yes. I do not expect you guys believe me. Now i know and I feel you always believe me guys, thank you so much : D i won't let you guys are not believe in me anymore ;)

Seriously it is not important!

So, "Today i dont feel like doing anything, i just wanna lie in my bed" yeah that was bruno mars's song. that situation just like me, seriously, i need something new, i need to refresh my mind, -___-" because since 23th February i had a lot of things to do, but it is not fun and dont make me feel better, yeah since that day, every day just liiiiikkkkkkkkkkkeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee suck day, there's nothing such a fun things and make me feel happy, aarrgggh why why and why? i dunno -,- i've just finished my UTS(Ujian Tengah Semester) on friday, so on tuesday i have to go to Jakarta, Bandung, and Yogyakarta!! yeah my school SMA 1, we're having study tour program, so we're going to those city and some university, i wish i have more fun things and i can refreshing my mind from those something old change into something new! So maybe after the study tour, im gonna write the story about my study tour, i wish i can enjoy my day, i wish we're okey, fine, there's nothing have a bad situation(AMEN) so byebye, see you, sorry this kinda' silly -,- and i wish we're okey SMA 1!!!!! we go there in a good condition and we're back to Jambi again, just on the same condition, yeah good condition like no one sick or something! (AMEN)

My dear, went away

My relationship started on 27th January 2012 and it is ended on 23th February 2012.

HOW?  I don't know exactly! Hendri Pondaga Septahadi decided to separated,

so, i just say yes. i can't make him stay. I want him to tell the reason, but he just say

"Maybe we are not suitable anymore" those words, sounds strange for me.

because, there's nothing happen, we're not fighting, we're fine. yeah maybe because i mad

at him in the afternoon on that day, i went to his school pensi and im alone, my friends are go,

so i ask him to sit beside me, im afraid, im alone, i dont know anyone there, but he didn't want 

im waiting for a couple hours, i sent some messages to my aunt,mycousin,myfriends,and k'andes,

and also i call them with hendri and ferry, but they didnt answer my phone, my tears came out.

i called k'andes and you know just k'andes replied my message and answered my phone, and i asked

him to picked me up, im waiting for him, and here he's come, he dropped me home. And i sent some message to Hendri, yeah we're fighting, and also hendri's friend ferry he promised me won't let me alone there but he

left me, i sent message to him, i hate you, you left me, and he sent some message just say, im sorry im sorry im sorry, he went to wtc to have lunch, he left his phone in the car. i just say okey.

and while im in my house i prepare to go to my english course, i've just sent bbm to hendri but he replied

with short words. so after i go back from richmond(course) i went to my friend's house, siti maidina, and

i tell her about my situation, and suddenly i've got bbm from hendri.

H: "so, how is our relationship?"

M: "what? pardon me?"

H: " i want we to ended this relationship."

M: "why?"

H: "maybe we are not suitable anymore"

M: "tell me the real reason, you don't love me anymore?"

H: "i want to ended this relationship!! maybe."

M: "Okey!! do not need to mad at me like that!"

H: "Okey okey"

M: "thanks for everything, thanks for completing my heart, im sorry

       if i made some mistake."

H: "okey you're welcome. me too."

So tha was my story, siti maidina and me have some conversation and after that i went

back home, suddenly i dropped my tears. and i asked k'andes what should i do, he said

to me if you love him, get him go back, if you're not just let him go, his not a gentleman,

because he's made a decision just because his emotional.

I'm to stupid, because i still love him, because i want go back have a relationship with him, even some of his and my friends said something, but i do, i really love you, all of those moments,

all of those words that came out from your mouth, all of those voice note,

everything, everything just came into my heart and hard to let it go.

You make my days change, different, you are different.


But i try to let you go :")

My 17

So, let's start about my 17th birthday.

Actually, my birthday is on 19th February, so it was a couple day ago.

yeah, i'd like to say thanks to my Jesus because i can live and life(haha) in this world

i'd like to say thanks to my mom, im here and i am a big girl now because of her too and also

my daddy, who's always protect me and help mom to make me such a good girl and big girl.

And my brothers (irvan&chris) and my sister(ingrid) thanks for the greetings and ypur pray :*

My dear boyfriend (Hendri Pondaga Septahadi) for the surprise and the gift :* you, even you

are too shy to made it but i really appreciate it bebeh, hahaa :D you woke up in the morning on

Sunday(he never waking up early on sunday) and you gave it to me in a hot 2.00 :D thanks bebeh

i love you so much.

and also Wira Andesman & Hendri Pondaga Septahadi, those two man the first one who say

Happy Birthday to me :) thanks a lot.

and also my friend, my family. i love you so much guys!!!!

and my classmate all of you! give me the cake too! thanks a lot :*

and thanks for the present my cousin(Sri) and also my room mate,

and Siti Maidina too!

and my Bestfriends (Clarissa,Alan,Ruri,Yoan,Enno,Yosi) who give the surprise too!

i'm sorry guys, all off you got a problem on the way because all of you wanna give me the surprise,

i'd really like to say thanks for all of you, i love you all! thanks for the presents, thanks for the cakes,thanks for the greetings,thanks for the surprises, thanks for the prays that all of you sent to me :')

AMEN!!!!

Although my mom and dad are far away from me, you guys fill my day :* always beside me, thanks, thanks a lot! Jesus, i love all of those people, please im begging to You, don't make me lost them, i do not want to be separated with them, because i really love them, like i love my self, and of course I LOVE YOU TOO JESUS. AMEN!!

Thanks God that i have all of them, really greatful. I LOVE YOU ALL!

AND THANKS JESUS!

Bego!

Begonya gue yang cengeng begini
Begonya gue yang cuma ngerasakan itu
Begonya gue yang ga ngerti perasaan sendiri
Begonya gue yang gabisa ngerti keadaan
Begonya gue yang gabisa ngerti dia
Begonya gue yang melepaskan dia
Begonya gue yang menganggap semua itu serius
Begonya gue yang selalu ke GR-an
Begonya gue yang tergantung sama lo
Begonya gue yang jadi orang jahat
Begonya gue yang cinta ama lo
Begonya gue yang sayang sama lo
Begonya gue yang mengira lo sayang sama gue
Begonya gue yang selalu ingin lo di samping gue
Begonya gue yang gak bisa membedakan
Begonya gue yang nulis ini entri
Begonya gue yang mau aja diketawain orang2
Begonya gue yang mau demi lo
Begonya gue yang stress gara2 lo
Begonya gue yang ngelakuin ini untuk lo
Kalo memang gue ga bego tunjukin!

Kamis, tanggal berapa ga tau, bulan berapa ga tau, tahun 2011

      Hai, anggap saja ini hari kamis, tanggal berapa ga tau, bulan berapa ga tau, tahun 2011.Ga tau ya biasanya hari kamis ini hari yaaah bisa di bilang hari yang tidak begitu mewarnai hidupku, tapi hari kamis ini secara tiba-tiba menjadi pewarna dalam hidup aku. Kenapa? aku menjalankan hari kamisku seperti biasa, sekolah dan les, sebuah kursus bahasa inggris pada pukul 5.10 saat itu aku di ajar oleh seorang guru yang bernama Miss Maria. Biasanya Mr. Steven tetapi karena ada hal yang menghambat pekerjaannya yaitu mengajar kami jadi dia tidak masuk, dan digantikan sementara oleh Miss.Maria. Kenapa aku senang?? *jreeng jreeng jreeeeeng~ bunyi gitar salah senar... (//-\\) Because when the sunshine will shine together *aalaaaah nyanyi lagu Rihanna lagi ('_') haha iya ampun, ya aku senang karena aku sekelompok dengan Dia,dia yang dulu pernah aku ceritakan sebelumnya. Ya dialah sosok yang memang tipeku, dia satu tempat kursus dan satu kelas denganku, Aku terkejut bahwa dia sekelompok denganku, anggota kelompok tersebut hanya beranggotakan dua orang, Aku dan Dia, perasaanku bercampur aduk kayak gado-gado. Disitu dia benar-benar menatapku dan membicarakan tentang yang kami diskusikan sangat serius. Dan lagi dia meminjam pulpenku, waktupun berjalan dan akhirnya kursus tersebut selesai, setibanya di parkiran ia memanggil namaku dan aku menolehnya, dia membuka tasnya dan mencari sesuatu, lalu dia mengeluarkan pulpenku tadi, aku tersenyum dan dia mengatakan kata-kata biasa jika orang mengucapkan terima kasih, "Thanks, dan hati-hati ya pulangnya." Waw aku tidak menyangka dia berkata seperti itu, hal bodoh yang kulakukan setiba aku sampai di dalam mobilku, aku mencium pulpen tersebut sambil menggumam " Thanks Jesus im so glad, even we're just talking like a friend, but i'm so happy!" Sejujurnya, dialah sosok yang, yah bisa dibilang aku mengagguminya, menyayanginya, karena aku sudah memiliki rasa saat aku pertama kali melihat sosoknya dialah yang akulihat saat aku duduk di bangku kelas 3 Sekolah menengah pertama, (SMP)  sampai aku kelas 2 Sekolah menengah atas (SMA) semester I kemarin,mungkin sekarang aku juga masih memiliki rasa tetapi hanya sebatas kakak kelas dan abang, sekarang dia duduk di kelas 3. Kukatakan dengan jujur, aku orang yang gampang jatuh cinta, ya bisa di bilang begitu, tapi terkadang ntah mengapa sulit untuk mengacuhkan pikiranku darinya. walaupun aku memiliki seorang kekasih. Tapi mulai tanggal, 6 Januari 2012 ini aku akan menegaskan semua perasaanku yang ada sekarang dan berusaha untuk bertahan dengan yang satu, menghilangkan perasaan jenuh serta menjadi terbaik bagi orang yang mencintai dan menyayangiku. Sekian, salam hangat dariku.